Missing Kyle

Missing you Kyle

Rambling thoughts way to early in the morning

I was awake this morning at 2:30 , 3.30 and decided to finally get out of bed at 5 am so as not to wake hubby before his allotted time of 7.He smacked me around 4 am scratching a lovely triangle on my forehead, which is already noticeable enough (high forhead? hell mines a cathedral).So I awoke in a very angry state.I have never liked anger. I lived with it for years as a child, both in my surroundings and inside myself. I was not allowed to show my anger as a child, choking it down until I could no longer stand it and then blowing in a spectacular show which I would get beaten for.Luckily I have learned to allow my daughter her anger while not surrounding her in my or my husbands. It truly is one of the things I am most proud of myself for in life.Being a good mother. I broke a cycle but it still seems to be churning inside of me.I guess that's where the art comes in. It gives me a safe outlet for all that's inside.

I hear a cry in the night.

Struggling to throw back the shroud of dreams, my heart races

I can not open my eyes, or move, my breath hurts

I feel ice cold inside of myself as I realize

The cries are my own and that I am still caught

the web of dreams pulls me back into my nightmare world

From which at least there is escape

Tears soak into my pillow melding with the acrid sweat

of bondage

as I am lost once more into the night

Churning

It's a mad mad world and The Guardian in the Shadows

"It's a Mad Mad World" is the second aceo I sold. It went to France at a time when things were indeed turbulent.

The same client bought this one

"The Guardian in the Shadows"

Industreal Disease

Sometimes my heart feels like this

Caught in the crosshairs

Cleaning the Closet

I am not sure where this blog is going to go but I need somewhere opposite of the Joyful Artists Blog. I try very hard there to post only joyful bits but it seems the darkness is always trying to creep in. So I thought I would give that darkness a home of it's own.
Where it can just be with no judgement.

Well that is my intention anyway. So if you do not like dark art and thoughts keep to joyful she will always be there for us both.

The monster in the Closet